Two days ago, on December 30th to be exact, I decided to completely disconnect from Facebook. I sent Facebook an archive request because I was afraid of losing all of those photos I've posted on Facebook over the years and Facebook sent me a compressed file of my entire Facebook history which I now have stored in my computer. Once I knew my photos were safe I deleted my Facebook account. I honestly don't know how many people realize I have taken this step (since I can't post on Facebook to share that information with the world) but I imagine that if someone notices that my stuff is no longer showing up in their feed they might wonder where I've gone and why.
To be honest I haven't gone anywhere, I'm still here! But what I have found happening repeatedly on Facebook is that we're all busy 'sharing' recipes, articles, opinions and photos and have stopped actually sharing ourselves. I also found that miscommunication is rampant and in my opinion it is because there is no ability to hear or use vocal inflection to convey meaning. There was an incident that precipitated my taking what feels to me like a huge step but it was really just the catalyst that forced me to put into action things I've been thinking and feeling for a while.
I made what was meant to be a funny remark on a photo that my cousin's son had posted and evidently it was not read the way I intended it. The reaction of my second-cousin and his wife was quick, furious and to be perfectly honest very hurtful in the way they both "spoke" to me. Well, obviously I apologized for making the comment in the first place but I was struck by my reaction to their words (and obviously their reactions to mine) and how nothing in the situation was positive. The truth is I barely know this guy, have never met his wife or his children and would have been better off not commenting at all. I had been fooled by Facebook into thinking we were "friends" when the truth is we are strangers in spite of being related. Why was I letting the misunderstanding and hurtful remarks of strangers bother me so much?
When I first started using Facebook it really was only friends I was in contact with. My thoughts and comments weren't available to a myriad of people I didn't know, but then Facebook made changes. (Isn't Facebook ALWAYS making changes?) They introduced the "feed" and I was suddenly getting "notified" of all kinds of things, if I had casually "liked" a photo I was now being told every time anyone else in the world "liked" or commented on the same photo. I was getting links to ads, pages, and events that I had no interest in because at some pinpoint in time I had said something about a related subject. I realized I was looking at Facebook 7-8 times a day, and I was not the only one. I could tell from my news feed who else was on it ALL THE TIME! I started to think of all the things I could have been doing with that time. Studying my Bible, working out at the gym, cleaning my house, writing on my blog, playing with my son, helping my daughter...the list is endless. The most convicting one was Bible study...how many times had I "not had time" to do my Bible study but apparently had unlimited time to peek into the lives of strangers on Facebook? And I use that word peek very deliberately, Facebook is a bit like voyeurism. We read what other people post, check out our news feed, look at everyone's photos and read the links and articles they put on their walls. We "like" this one or that one (which usually means it espouses an opinion we agree with) and wish we could "dislike" another one. I can't count how many times I have posted my opinion without bothering to read anyone else's, or if I did read it to give it any kind of real consideration, and I know that I'm not the only one who does that. I'm not that special. So....the end result is I am no longer on Facebook. I can be reached by phone or e-mail. If you really are a friend you will have that information or know how to get it.
